I awoke to the phone ringing.
I lifted my head and looked at the clock. It was 7:30.
I jumped up from my chair, darted over to the phone, and snatched it off the wall.
“Hello?”
“Harry, what’s going on? Why aren’t you here?” It was Dr. Mercer, sounding not the least bit happy.
I didn’t know how to respond. I was still in a daze, trying to figure out how I had managed to fall asleep at such a time.
“Sorry, Dr. Mercer,” I finally said. “Did I miss the meeting?”
“Yes. You missed it.”
“Do I still have a job?” I asked, somewhat jokingly.“Hard to say, Harry. For the moment, you’re officially suspended. But I imagine we’re looking at a termination, yes.”
I was stunned.
Despite the fact that I had known this was how things were going to play out, I was stunned.
“Don’t bother coming in,” Dr. Mercer continued, not waiting for me to respond. “You’ll get a call if anything new develops.” And he hung up.
I leaned against the kitchen wall, phone in hand, struggling to make sense of it all.It really happened.I was done teaching. It was over. Just like that.Slowly, I hung up the phone and sat back down at the table.
Now what?
I had no idea. For the first time in my life, my future was blank. Completely blank.
Part of me was relieved. I felt as though I had just finished a book, or slammed a door shut. A phase completed, a chapter ended.
I took a deep breath. And then I remembered God.
“Ah, God!” I shouted. “What do you think of all this?!”
I smiled. “I said I was going to sue you. You ready?”
The house seemed quieter than usual. Not a sound.
I laughed and stood up. I walked over to my desk, opened the middle drawer, and took out a pencil and a notebook. Then I carried them back to the kitchen table and sat down. I opened the notebook to the first page.
I took a long, deep breath, and then another, and I closed my eyes.
Thoughts flowed through my head, one after another. Images of courtrooms, images of Jesus, Mohammed, Buddha. Images of saints, priests, monks, nuns. I saw Mecca, and thousands of men in white sheets sitting upon a rock covered hill.
I saw crusaders on horseback holding blood-tipped swords. I saw suicide bombers and planes flying into buildings.
I saw a man on a cross. I saw a woman holding a dying man in the street. I saw a man in a grey suit, standing at a pulpit, one hand holding a Bible and the other raised in a clenched fist.
I opened my eyes, and my kitchen came flooding back. I sat for several minutes pondering the images that had just moved through my mind. Then I thought about what a lawsuit against God might sound like, how it would be worded. I thought of the legal jargon I had seen and heard in movies and on television. Then I picked up the pencil and wrote the following:
I, Harold Phillips, hereby sue God, our Maker.
I don’t know if anyone else will ever know about this, but at this point it does not matter. I think I may have a case, and I shall do my best to present it here.
I name myself, Harold M. Phillips, as plaintiff.
I name God as the defendant.
I am accusing God of gross negligence and inciting disharmony.
The reasons for my accusations are as follows:
1. God has sent various messengers and prophets and saints, but these individuals have delivered conflicting messages. There are contradictions between them, and God has made no apparent effort to clarify for us which messages are correct and which ones are incorrect. Therefore, the human race has been left to interpret these messages. And we can all see where that has gotten us.
2. God has allowed the human race to splinter into innumerable groups, each with their own beliefs, and He (or She) has allowed us to argue, fight, and murder each other, often in His (or Her) name.
I, on behalf of the human race, hereby accuse God of the charges above, and I seek, as compensation for pain and suffering, the following:
1. God will send us a new messenger, one that will specify which previous messages were authentic and which were not. This messenger will also clarify the underlying truth existing in all spiritual teachings, and point out where the human race has erred in interpreting these teachings.
2. God will provide, through His (or Her) messenger, a new message, one that encompasses and clarifies the Truth. He (or She) will make this new message available to all members of the human race and will NOT allow it to become distorted or manipulated in the way that virtually all previous messages have.
I do this knowing full well that I may be damning myself in some way. I do it knowing full well that the words I have written here will be considered blasphemous by adherents to many religions. And I do it knowing full well that my time spent in the afterlife (if I am privileged to make it there) may be affected by the thoughts in my head and the words on these pages.
However, I feel in my heart that God, if He (or She) is indeed listening and paying attention to what I am doing and thinking and writing here today, knows that my intentions are pure, and that my motivation is nothing short of wanting to understand, once and for all, the Truth.
I, Harold M. Phillips, seek nothing but the Truth.
And I am asking God to deliver it to me.
To all of us.
Once and for all.
