Chapter 29
Okay, enough from those two. It’s my turn.
My name is Anne.
And before I get started, I want to compliment Harry and Paul on their contributions to the story. Are you enjoying it so far?
The guys have given you some of the details of our early years together. It was important that you get a feel for what things were like back then, because what comes later had its beginnings, in many ways, in Harry’s backyard.
There was a magical quality to our many conversations atop Harry’s mound, and that magical quality would eventually grow into something big. So while the three of us were busy laughing and telling stories, we were putting into motion something that would come to fruition many years later.
Okay, so let’s get started.
First of all, I am nothing like Harry and Paul described me. Well, maybe they were right about a few things: I am reasonably attractive (though I’ve now got some wrinkles around my eyes, and I’m not as pleased with some parts of me as I used to be).
I’m also very talkative at times. That’s one of the reasons I pursued a law degree – I love to discuss, argue, examine perspectives, things like that. When I first started working as an attorney, I was in heaven. It was exactly what I had envisioned, and I met and worked with the most amazing, intelligent people I have ever known.
Twelve years later, I was done with law. Unfortunately, I was still a lawyer. And I didn’t have any other interests that appealed to me. At least not enough to pursue in earnest. But you’ll never guess what saved me. You’ll never guess what came along at just the right time. Actually, you’ll never guess who came along at just the right time: Paul.
That’s right. I fell for Paul like I’ve never fallen for anyone else. You might not have realized it from what he told you, but Paul is a sweetheart. Probably the sweetest man I’ve ever met. Yes, he can be rather blunt and sarcastic. But so can I. And, in fact, those are two of the qualities that drew me to him in the first place. But underneath, he is very sweet and generous.
Paul told you about his trip to California. Well I, too, have always felt a draw to the West Coast, though not to California specifically. I am more drawn to the north, to Oregon and Washington and British Columbia. Perhaps I was once a Native American living in that area. That’s the only explanation I’ve been able to come up with for the strong draw I have always felt to that part of the country.
Let me give you a few more details about myself, while we’re on the subject (of me). I’m 5’ 8” tall, of average weight. I have dirty blonde hair, which I sometimes color either darker or lighter, depending on my mood. I think I look better with darker hair, but sometimes I need a change and, when I do, I go blonde. Not totally blonde, but almost. Particularly in the summer, if I have time to work on my tan.
I exercise once or twice a week, I enjoy hiking, kayaking occasionally, and I love a good game of volleyball at summer picnics. Growing up, I had lots of cousins and aunts and uncles, and we were always going to outdoor gatherings and family reunions. My family was big on parties, and most of my childhood memories are of playing with my cousins, shooting off bottle rockets, making whirlpools in Uncle Ed’s pool, and riding go-carts in the field behind his house.
I had a wonderful childhood, despite having a Mother who drives me crazy. She is the kind of person who has an opinion about everything, and she never hesitates to express it. That’s where I got my talkative, opinionated nature from. I love her dearly, but I can’t spend too much time around her. Just little doses, short visits, and everything is fine.
So back to Paul. A week after he returned from California, I received a phone call from him. I don’t think we had ever spoken on the phone before, and I was very surprised to hear his voice when I picked up the phone.
He had told me the previous weekend that he had received a job offer in the Bay area and that he would most likely be moving out in August. I remember feeling sad, but I tried not to let it show. I was, by then, quite fond of him, and had even gone so far as to kiss him at a baseball game, as he told you. And now, with the knowledge that he would soon be leaving for California, the appreciation I had begun to feel for him grew even stronger.
When he called, I was thrilled. My heart jumped in my chest, beating a mile a minute. We talked about his job offer, about his friend Ravi, and about all the things he did during his trip. I was jealous, though not of Paul. Of Ravi. I wished I had been the one driving down the coast with Paul, or having lunch with him in San Francisco.
I know, I sound like a little girl. But you know what? I am a little girl. I’m not afraid to admit it. There is a little girl inside of me. I think there is a child within all of us, one that we rarely let out. It comes out when we’re really happy, or sad, or drunk, or scared. But it’s there. It never really goes away. It just gets locked away, covered up.
So one of the ways Paul affected me was that he brought out the little girl in me. He inspired childhood fantasies that I had long since forgotten about – my prince, my knight in shining armor. He’ll probably gag or roll with laughter when he reads this, but it’s true. I can’t explain it, but it’s absolutely true.
So where did all this lead? What happened as a result of my infatuation with Paul? Was it temporary? Was it a schoolgirl crush?
No, it was not a schoolgirl crush. It was just as intense, but I was no longer a little girl. At least not on the outside. I was a successful professional, in her mid-thirties, and I was ready for the next phase of my life. I was through with the dating game. I never found anyone that way. Blind dates, double dates, arranged dates. Ugh. It was awful. I had met plenty of nice men over the years, but nobody I strongly connected with.
The first man I ever really connected with, in a deep and meaningful way, was Harry. And Harry will always have a special place in my heart. I was attracted to him, and I still am. But our relationship never became romantic. It probably could have, if either of us had brought it up. But we never did. Nonetheless, he is by far the most interesting person I have ever known. By far.
My relationship with Harry is unique. There is a comfort between us, one that I can’t really explain or describe. When I’m around Harry, or talking to him on the phone, I’m in a different place. There is an energy to our interaction that makes me feel alive and inspired.
So Harry and I have a deep friendship, one that does not require any kind of description or specifics. It just is. Harry and I are connected, and there is no need whatsoever to define that connection. I think we both know that.
And then Paul came along. I knew he was drawn to me, from the beginning. There was rarely a moment that I looked at him when he wasn’t looking at me. His eyes seemed to follow me everywhere. And at first, I assumed it was just because he was attracted to me. And who could blame him? I’m quite the catch! (she said with a sarcastic wink)
But after a while, I came to realize that he was an extremely open-minded and insightful person who was genuinely interested in what I had to say, and that his appreciation for me went beyond physical attraction. He really was fond of me, and I quickly grew fond of him as well.
So at the end of our phone conversation, after we had talked about California and job offers and various other things (we talked for well over an hour), I took a chance and asked him if he would like to have dinner with me some night before he left for the coast. He quickly said yes, and we agreed to meet at a local restaurant the following weekend.
I remember hanging up the phone and dancing around my apartment. I was happier and more excited than I had been in many years, probably since passing the bar exam. I was on a high that lasted for days. Weeks, actually.
Paul and I went out and enjoyed a wonderful dinner, and then we had lunch together three days later, and just like that we were a couple. We kept it from Harry at the beginning, though. Which was Paul’s idea. He was convinced that Harry had some sort of undying, unexpressed love for me, and that he would be heartbroken when he found out we were dating.
I felt no such awkwardness, and finally, after deciding the whole thing was rather silly, I called Harry and told him about Paul and I. Harry was thrilled at the news, and said that he had suspected all along that we would end up together. I immediately called Paul and told him about my talk with Harry, and in the end there was no awkwardness at all. Everything felt right.
So I finally had myself a man. One that I felt a deep affection for, unlike anything I had felt before. All my previous relationships had remained on the surface. I was never really myself around the others.
This was my fault, I know, and perhaps it took me until I was well into my thirties before I was ready to truly be myself around others. And maybe Harry had something to do with that. Maybe being around Harry helped me to come out of my shell. As I said before, he had that effect on me. I was myself around Harry, and perhaps that helped me to be myself around Paul. Harry provided the safe place I needed in order to peel away the facade I had always carried around with me, to finally be myself.
So that summer I found happiness. However, I had very little time to bask in it. I would soon face my first hurdle, my first obstacle to maintaining such happiness.
I guess that’s how life works sometimes: you finally find what you’ve always wanted, what you’ve always hoped for… you finally find someone who brings out the best in you, who inspires you to feel the kind of joy you’ve always yearned for…
And then he moves to California.
